Someone on the merchandising team is working overtime to turn the serious new Robert Pattinson movie into Sonic the Hedgehog

By all accounts, The Batman will be a dark, dark movie. Taking its visual cues from Seven, and featuring a protagonist who has a breakdown and finds himself lured into intractable ethical murk by the suffocating power of vengeance, all signs point to the film being three hours of grot and depression and anguish.

But wait, have you tried the new The Batman Oreos yet? They’re absolutely bat-licious!

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